The BEST Valentine's Day Card

This is for all those guys out there that dread Valentine's Day shopping. What should I get her?  What if she doesn't like it?  ...wait...I have to buy her something?!  Sound familiar?  Don't worry you've come to the right place.

Unless you have some spectacular idea, go with chocolate and something that will make her smile.  After typing that sentence I realized any "spectacular idea" from a guy is a little risky and should probably be avoided.  But hey, suit yourself!  Coming from a girl, you can't go wrong with chocolate!

Now I know guys like simple.  Quick, easy, straight to the point.  Here's what you need to do.  Go to the gas station/grocery store/dollar general/etc. and buy the candy bars.  (you'll find a list at the bottom) If you don't have a big piece of paper or something to attach them to already, pick up one of those also.  

Now lay everything out on your poster and copy the message below. (bolded words are candy bars)  I suggest writing in pencil first and then going over it in sharpie.  That way you're able to erase mistakes.  

Sweet Tart,

     I wish I could put into words the Mounds of Almond Joy you bring me.  Your Whatchamacallit sends me head over heels.  I'd Take 5 of your Kisses over 100 Grand any day!  All this talk is making me sound like a Mr. Goodbar, but Tootsie Roll, I love you to Pieces.  Happy Valentine's Day!

Love Your, 

Sugar Daddy

Finally, tape the candy bars in there place.  Now was it that painful?  Give this to your sweetheart and I guarantee she'll SNICKER!  

What You'll Need

Mounds

Almond Joy

Whatchamacallit

Take 5

Hershey Kisses

100 Grand

Mr. Goodbar

Tootsie Roll

Reese's Pieces

Sugar Daddy's

Poster or other large paper

Pencil

Sharpie

Tape